Congratulations! You’ve met that special someone who makes you excited to get down on one knee. Compared to finding love, finding the perfect ring should be a walk in the park. But it’s still an important hurdle to overcome. Thankfully, there are effective steps you can take to make the whole shebang less complicated.

How Good You Are at Surprising Your Lady

First off, be honest with yourself about how good you are at surprising your special lady. Does it usually go off without a hitch, and does she actually like what you’ve surprised her with? If you’re a little rusty in the unexpected gift area, consider involving her in the ring selection process. There is a chance that asking for her input might dull the romantic shine of the proposal, but if you think she would rather be perfectly happy than perfectly surprised, consider consulting the source directly.

Find Her Style in Jewelry She Wears

If you’re gung ho and committed to the surprise route, you need to get your Sherlock Holmes on. Begin by paying extra close attention to the jewelry she wears and window shops for. Is she drawn to classic diamonds or eclectic, responsibly-sourced gemstones? Is she inspired by glamour and flash, or does she tend to choose simple and uncluttered? Conduct your research (under the radar, of course) and soon you should have a decent idea of what to look for when picking out the ring.

Ask Friends About Her Favorite Engagement Ring

Another stealthy way to discover what your first lady values in an engagement ring is to ask one of her close friends. You’ll want to ensure that this person is a) trustworthy enough to not immediately start gabbing about the situation and b) embraces a sense of style that you or your significant other have not openly cringed over.

Ask Her Opinions about Ring Indirectly

If you decide her friends might be too excited to keep a secret, try asking her opinion of rings under the guise of someone else’s situation. Let her know your co-worker is looking to pop the question and he’s asked you both for objective opinions on rings. Depending on your capacity to spin a good yarn, this will either go smoothly and give you some insight into what she likes, or implode as she sees through your attempted tale.

The decision is ultimately up to you. Don’t fret over the choice, but make sure to muster all the romance you’ve got for this one. Keep in mind how much you adore your lady, and how much you want her to adore this ring and all that it signifies.

Because after all, she’s worth it.